On Monday night (as in, the 2 year anniversary of the finale of Ashes - as if any of you won’t know what I’m talking about!)…　 after my rehearsal somebody said:

‘Pub?’

and everyone in the group just went round agreeing:

‘Pub.’

‘Pub.’

‘Pub.’

I don’t think any of them watch Ashes, or knew exactly what they were saying at roughly just after 9 o’clock on that particular evening… but I had such a tingly warmth in my heart when I said my bit. 

‘Pub.’ :)

‘We could be heroes’

I know there’s been quite a few of these popping up but I need to do one too. 

Two years ago. Two years ago today we found out the truth about that world and said goodbye to them all. Today I finished my first proper rewatch - and just shook and sobbed my way through the last three episodes. It still feels so raw. I have to be honest, and say I don’t like everything about the finale (i.e. Alex losing everything, although I do understand why that had to be done in the sense of the show as a whole rather than just what we’d like for the characters). That said, I think it’s the best finale, and just the best tv programme all round, that I’ve ever seen. But it’s more than that.

I know I’ve said it before so I won’t go into it in detail, but Ashes is something really, REALLY special to me. It might be a bit overdramatic to say it saved my life, but you wouldn’t be far wrong. Being unconscious, the whole coma thing, still really terrifies me. And of course I know Ashes is fictional, but the concept of it just makes me feel like I don’t need to be quite as scared. It helped me more than words can ever explain, and I’m so grateful that I had the chance to meet them all and tell them that and say thank-you last weekend.

I had a field day during my rewatch picking up on all the clues - although I’m not sure you could call them clues, seeing as they were so obvious! Seriously, all the subtle little clues that are so obvious once you know the truth, like ‘I’m going to unearth you, Hunt’, and even simple things like Keats being in shadow and Gene’s face being uplit - and there’re hints all through Mars as well! But even now, two years on, after I’ve watched the episodes God knows how many times, I’m still noticing new things and picking up new links - and it can still make me laugh and cry or get my heart beating with fear or love as if I’m watching it for the first time. That’s the sign of something amazing.

One line in particular always gets me:

“He didn’t deserve a shallow grave, did he? Did he, Alex?”

“No. No, you didn’t.”

And the ‘Heroes’ montage at the end. Oh, God…

These things will stay with me for the rest of my life. I’m so glad the people here on tumblr are keeping it alive, and I hope we’ll have many more years of fangirling and hopeless sobbing to come. :) Thank-you <3  

Ohhh, what I wouldn’t give for it to be exactly this time a week ago… I would have just met the beautiful Evie and would still have all of the rest of that amazing day to go. -sigh-

If anyone wants me, I’ll just be curled up here reliving it all <3

On another note, my Ashes rewatch is going well! I’ll probably get through most of the rest of S3 today - and leave the finale to mark 2 years tomorrow. :)